Five Reasons I’m Glad my Husband Joined a Play

This post was originally published on East Idaho Collective on October 11, 2022. EIM closed on February 15, 2023. I have moved my posts to this blog in order to preserve the collection of my writing. East Idaho Collective was for women to connect with each other. These posts are less about travel and more about what it was like for me to be a mom in Idaho in 2018-2023.

This post was supposed to be about how happy I was to be participating in the Magic Valley Symphony. I played the string bass when I was a teenager, but stopped playing when I left high school. After a 17 year break I started playing it again with the Magic Valley Symphony in the fall of 2020 (that was one of the few happy things that happened that year).

I was planning to play with the Symphony again this fall. I was going to tell you how great it was to connect with my younger self by doing something that I first started doing when I was ten. I was going to tell you that even though I was 4th chair and a mediocre musician I still really enjoyed making music with a group of people. I was going to tell you how great it was to have a hobby as a mom.

But then my husband got into the ensemble for Guys and Dolls with the Magic Valley Repertory Theatre.

He’d been a background character in a Living Nativity in December. He’d talked with another background character who told him about the Repertory Theater and encouraged him to join. That man had mentioned they’d be doing Guys and Dolls later in the year.

I highly encouraged my husband to be in Guys and Dolls, but it was a little disappointing when I looked at the rehearsal and show schedule. Rehearsals for the play would conflict with symphony rehearsals. And the first symphony dress rehearsal and concert would happen opening weekend for the play.

Maybe if our children were older we could have figured out a way for me to be in the symphony while my husband was in the play, but doing both just wasn’t practical for the time of life we are in. Someone had to be home to make sure the kids did their homework and went to bed at a decent time. And that someone would be me.

Even though I was a little sad about missing out on the symphony I’m still really happy my husband did the play.

Here are 5 reasons that I’m glad he was in the play.

He needed a hobby – a true hobby

My husband has very few leisure activities. He doesn’t hunt or play video games. He enjoys making things with wood, but usually that involves making things for me or the house so it’s more of a chore than a hobby. He likes hiking and camping, but those aren’t exactly relaxing when four children are involved. Being in a play gave him a chance to do something that he truly enjoyed without also having to be a husband and a father. He had a great time learning the songs and the dance routines. He’s a good singer, but never really did much singing before this play. He’d never danced before, but he learned for the play. He was able to stretch and grow in ways that he’d never had a chance to do before. 

He needed people he could have fun with

My husband is very personable and can talk to just about anybody, but he’s really struggled with finding good friends. He’s had good relationships with co-workers and people at church, but those haven’t turned into deeper friendships. Being in the play gave him a chance to meet so many more people and to have fun with them on a nightly basis. He’d often come home from rehearsal and say things like, “I talked to so-and-so. They are very fun.” On opening night of the play the cast and crew went out to dinner after the show. My husband came home with so many funny stories about their conversations and what they’d done. 

I needed a chance to slow down

I’m a chronic over-committer. I like to have lots of things to do and I’m always looking for new things to add to my list. So it was actually a really good reset to need to be home every night while my husband was rehearsing for the play. I can’t tell you how many times I was tempted to sign up for something, but then thought, “oh wait, that’s a rehearsal night. I have to be home.” I still managed to do a lot, but things I did NOT sign up for include a class about canning, a class about grant writing, weekly yoga, not to mention the symphony which I’m not entirely sure I would have had time for anyway. 

My children were able to see their dad do something creative

I took my kids to the opening night of the play. They were so excited to see their dad on stage. It was really cool for them to see the dances that he’d practiced in our living room come to life on stage and to hear the songs that we’d been listening to for weeks be performed with a group of people. I want my children to know that creativity isn’t just a childhood thing. It’s something that they can do their whole lives. Seeing their dad enjoy doing something outside his normal comfort zone was a good life lesson for my children.

It gave me a chance to support my partner

My husband is so supportive of all my crazy ideas and endeavors. I’m often in over my head on some project and he takes care of the kids so I can focus or he swoops in with his talents and helps me get things done. Last year when I was in school he made dinner nearly every night so I could study. He never complained when he had to put the kids to bed because I had symphony rehearsal, or a PTO meeting, or a work staff meeting, or a class, or a church get-together, or a women’s retreat, or a writing project (yep, I’m an over-committer). I’ve liked having a chance to pay my husband back for all the times he helped me with my hobbies and activities. And don’t worry; I still have plenty of time to be in the symphony. I plan to re-join the symphony in January and participate in the second half of the season. I’ll be able to be in two concerts.

 
In the meantime, I’m happily supporting my husband during the rest of this run of Guys and Dolls.

You can see him in the play at the Orpheum Theater in Twin Falls until Sunday, October 23rd.